Saturday, July 9, 2011

I'm your pusher...

That was the song, along with White Horse, playing thru my head as I left the nutritionist office yesterday.  I decided that surely there must be an issue since I've gained 10lbs since moving to Sacramento, and only seem to be loosing the same 3lbs (totally sucks).  Of course, reading Jilian Michael's Master Your Metabolism feed my brain with "I must certainly have a hormone imbalance since I can't seem to evict these nagging pounds".  I made an appointment with a local nutritionist, thinking I would have my hormone levels tested.

Our session went more along the lines of "tell me a little about yourself". And I did...but just a little. I know there is a root cause for this weight gain. I can't continue to blame my fibroid, or hormone imbalance (caused by the fibroid).  It's caused because I am attempting self medicate (along with prescribed happy pills) mild depression.  I can get through my work days ok, but the weekends are difficult. So therefore, I eat.  She took 1 look at my food diary (I kept it for 3 days, 3 of the wrong days) and said I am eating too much - DUH!  But she's right. I am eating the "right" things, but too much of the right things. My portion sizes need work, but not as much as I thought.  It's just too many items on my plates (especially at work). She also suggested that I cut out dairy.  Um, hell no!  I like LOVE cheese. So I am making a small concession. Swapping real milk for soy and almond. Dropping the greek yogurt and cottage cheese. But I will continue to have feta on my salads, swiss on my sandwiches.

But the glaring issue is the depression.  She hit home with the fact that I need to branch out.  As a solitary person, that is the most difficult thing to do in a new city. I can continue to whine about this place not being Houston or I can learn to make the best of it. Hence, the "Things that don't suck" issues. I plan to make a better effort of branching out, using Meetup.com and actually making it to so of the events.

At the end of the session, of course she tried to sell me a $300 6 session package along with supplements of serotonin and dopamine. I bought the supplements, not the additional sessions. Some days I think holistic medicine is just a game to get your money and not provide results. However, I can say, upon reflecting on my meeting yesterday, it felt good to release some issues that have been troubling me. I know it's up to me to work through this and get my ass out of the funk I'm in. It's all about choices and I choose to not be unhappy.

So the journey continues.

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