Happy Monday, Ya'll.
This weekend actually didn't fly by for me, probably because I spent most of it sleeping. I'm not really sure why I was so dog tired - oh wait, yes I do. I took a turbo kickboxing class that was like hatha yoga on crack. There were so many women in the room, it was becoming increasingly dangerous during the kick sections and all I could muster was 30 mins (through the 1st turbo) before feeling lightheaded. My intention was to head home, take a nap before BF and I went to a b-day party for one of his football club buddies.
Last week, I boasted (or so it seemed) on our ability to talk with each other. Well my blabbering mouth opened like a flood gate at the most inopportune time - during the party. I'm not sure if it was the pinot grigio that loosened my lips or what but I couldn't stop and the things that have been bugging me about "us" just came rolling out like a steam roller. I talked, he listened. We went to the car - he talked, I listened. Not to bore you all with the details, but the end result is that he needs to figure out how to live for himself (versus always doing for everyone else) and find his "man pants" again and I need to learn to be patient, enjoy "dating", and keep my swagger (or "edge", as he likes to call it). Luckily, we didn't let my verbal diatribe ruin our evening (although we scraped our movie plans) and we're still working on "us".
Previously, I've never been a long-term dater and have never really wanted to expend a lot of energy with one person (I have a short attention span and loose interest very quickly). Now, I've been given the opportunity to enjoy BF's company, he's kept my interest and I devour our time together and constantly want more. This is the root of my issue.When we first started dating, I was working on my degree which took up a huge chunk of time. So I need to learn to temper and focus on other things.
My action plan (which is also one of my goals): Focus on studying for the GRE. This will keep me busy so that I am not constantly harping on him for time. This will also get me off the fence so I can work on completing this goal.