Wednesday, March 24, 2010

How many years has it been...

Since we've been together?  I think the 2nd anniversary of our first date is approaching fast. I remember it was right before Easter. I am terrible with dates.  I can remember his birthday because it's 2 days before mine. I am reminded of his mother's passing because it's Valentine's Day. But beyond these two major events in his life, I don't commit dates to memory.  Is that terrible?  I don't think so. It's US that makes our time together memorable, not the date.

I was revisiting some of my posts from earlier in the year - lamenting over the doom of becoming the "boring couple" and devising a plan to fend off that harbinger. Then a comment from Karen (Fitness: A Journey Not a Destination - a great blog for helpful advice on fitness, health, etc.) appeared. She asked if we cooked together and that jarred my memory of said "boring couple".  I can admit that things are better between us.  He is making a solid effort to maintain date night and just generally "hang out" with me.  I have made a solid effort to think of him and his needs over my own (shopping and dining out). As for cooking together, we did sign up for a Williams and Sonoma cooking technique class, but ended up canceling because we both wanted to just BE (be alone with each other). He's thoroughly excited about the trip to Seattle (actually, we both are even though it is 4 months away!).

His job prospects haven't materialized due to this crappy economy.  So last night, he hit me with the notion that he may have an opportunity in Atlanta. The thought of him moving still hasn't hit me yet but I don't think I will be bummed if he did move. Not because I don't care/love him, but because he needs to do it.  He needs to break from the current living situation, the current status quo. Of course, I told him to jump at the opportunity because it would put him back into salary bracket he is comfy with.  This will also offer him the opportunity to work with a manager/mentor he was very fond of. And at the moment, nothing is set in stone.

So as the calendar event approaches, 2 years spent with a man who is a gentle lover, who hasn't made me feel dependent, and who is open to new adventures makes one reflect on the past and plan for the next phase of things to come. I have finally come to peace with my major issue with him (his living situation) and have made a silent pact with myself not to press him.  Yes, there are couples who marry 6 months after dating, there are couples who marry 13 years after dating, and there are couples who never marry but stay committed to each other. I'm not sure if marriage is the path I want, but I do know that whatever path we take, we take it together.

Song of the day: Anniversary by Tony Toni Tone


Deborah Estelle said...

Ms. LaShaune! Thank you for always being so encouraging of my writings! You are like my number 1 supporter (besides my hubby to be). I appeciate it! :) I am back with a bang girl! No more living in anyone's shadow or fading into the background! Shoot I'm too big for that anyway... So my new motto? Bigger is better baby! Ready or not? Here I come! Blessings!

Struggler said...

Well, regardless of the date, Happy Anniversary. ;)

Savvy Gal said...

ah.... You are so supportive. he is lucky to have you.

Anonymous said...

Ok, that was one of the sweetest things I have ever read. Made me cry, I mean it to, it made me cry.....You are one special gal LTD and he's ok too :) Love ya girl- kjcp

LaShaune said...

@Deborah: You are most welcome. Never let anyone take your glory. Keep on striving and your efforts will bear fruit!

@Struggler: thanks! It was actually March 20. I had to pull out my scrapbook and find his directions to my house.

@SG: Actually, I'm lucky to have him. He's a welcomed (and hopefully permanent) change of pace.

@KJCP: You are too much. I love ya just the way you are!